Harvey tackles age-old relationship question, challenges one unmarried couple.
Aug. 19, 2009 — It is an age-old concern every couple faces: Can men and women actually be “just buddies” or does sexual attraction and envy take control? Let’s say one individual remains in contact with an ex, or has an opposite-sex pal?
“Good Morning America” special contributor Steve Harvey will abide by Billy Crystal’s character into the film “When Harry Met Sally, ” whom famously stated, “Males and ladies cannot be buddies. The sex part almeanss gets into the genuine means. “
Research into the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology estimated that the opposite-sex relationship can lead to an event normally as 15 per cent of that time.
Whom more straightforward to weigh in about this relationship that is classic compared to man whoever brand new relationship book “Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man” sits at number 1 regarding the nyc Times Hardcover guidance bestseller list?
Author, comedian, actor and host Steve Harvey tackled this subject by having quantity of partners.
Justin Vanlandschoot and Stacy Marsch
Hitched for four years
Vanlandschoot, 33, had a lady friend who had been coaching him in a competition that is speaking. Marsch, 37, knew it was signed, “Love ya. About her, but one day saw an e-mail from her husband to this woman and”
Although Marsch claims that women and men may have friends that are opposite-sex she felt uncomfortable and confronted him.
Vanlandschoot claims though there had been next to nothing happening it was not worth jeopardizing his marriage and he ended the friendship between him and his friend.
“You typed, ‘love you’? ” Harvey asked Valandschott. “that is pretty dangerous. I can not also type ‘We as if you a good deal’ without beginning a significant fire. “
He told Valandschott which he did the right thing by closing the relationship.
“I’m simply regarding the belief that a few should form a circle that is two-handed” Harvey said. “Outside relationships. Just what good do they bring to your marriage? “
Aaron Bouw and Lindsey Dahlin
Dating for three to four days
Dahlin, 25, states it really is fine for males and ladies to ” be buddies. Simply” nonetheless, Bouw, 29, says that women pull the card that is naive and do not realize it whenever a male friend is enthusiastic about them. Bouw claims he trusts Dahlin, he simply does not trust her man buddies.
“I’m sure just exactly just how males think, ” Bouw stated. “we now have something on our brain. “
Harvey told Buow he had been wanting to mark their territory, maybe maybe not chatavenue. com protect Dahlin.
“that is just just how men are, that is how exactly we think, ” Harvey said. “It is very nearly practically impossible for a guy become a female’s buddy. The only reason we’re your friend is because you have made it completely clear it’s geting to go no longer than this. “
Can Both Women And Men Simply Be Friends?
Sharon and Bill Brewser
Sharon Brewster, 53, stated she nearly called down her wedding because she found a text from an other woman on the spouse’s mobile phone that ended with “sweet ambitions. “
“we heard Bill’s phone go off, ” she said. “we sought out and confronted him. I became really upset. “
“she is definitely not saying have dreams that are sweet your lady, ” Harvey said.
Sharon’s spouse, Bill Brewster, 52, informed her which he always got along better with women than guys. But understanding that Sharon will not think both women and men could be “simply buddies, ” he would not inform her about several of their feminine buddies.
“the top error that I made had been that she don’t find out about her, ” Bill stated.
Mary Fitzgerald and Bill Soldwisch
Dating for 11 years
Fitzgerald and Soldwisch both have actually buddies associated with opposite-sex and never say it has been a challenge. Even though few have not hitched, they remain committed and state they’d never ever do just about anything to jeopardize the partnership.
Having feminine friends has “never been an issue, ” Soldwisch stated. “they have been my close friends. I am lucky to include myself with confident feamales in my entire life. “
“they’re going to continually be urge, however when you are in a genuine committed relationship, why ruin a great thing? ” Fitzgerald stated.
Harvey ended up being astonished Fitzgerald did not would like to get hitched.
” we haven’t any specific fascination with being hitched, ” she stated. “we do not need the bit of paper. “
They do relate to one another as wife and husband, making it “easier for the public that is general” Soldwisch stated.
“we just have no idea a girl who doesn’t desire to be hitched, ” Harvey stated. “we’m stuck. “
Can Gents And Ladies Stay Friends? People Weigh In
“GMA” also received a huge selection of emails from audiences desperate to join the discussion.
Angela McDaniel from Lufkin, Tex., composed in about psychological infidelity.
“My spouse has already established a few feminine friends that i did not learn about. In case your partner doesn’t realize about their buddy then you’re having a difficult event! If perhaps you weren’t there is no good reason to slip & keep in touch with the buddy. “
Brenda Velasquez from Modesto, Calif., claims women and men could be buddies without causing issues inside their wedding. ” simply just Take me personally for an illustration. After my marriage that is first’re nevertheless buddies. In reality my ex-husband is leasing a space from my husband that is current and. I think, it really is simply on how civilized and developed you’re in the relationship and situation. “
Heather from Birch Run, Mich., e-mailed “GMA” to inquire about Harvey a concern.
“My best friend is a male. We dated for an extremely time that is short years back right after twelfth grade. When my now spouse and I also began dating he knew we hung out several times about him and. But about 2 yrs directly after we got hitched my better half began making remarks about him. Now every right time we battle, he tosses him up in my own face. We have no clue ways to get him to avoid. Any tips? “